Pride

Monday 21 Feb 2011 Life changed in an instant for my family. We were enjoying the lovely sledding activity at Bearspaw, though I was a little concerned that the hill was so steep, and slick. I just wanted to show off my new sled, the Zipfy, that I had not had a lot of chance to try out. Previously, I had taken a few runs, and hit the jump at the bottom, sending myself, and my daughter all over the hill. The second to last run I tried my hardest to stay on course, and with the big blue sled, it seemed natural to lean back after I went over the jump. I now wonder if that is what did me in. On my final run, using the Zipfy sled, I had a good start, good run, and moments before I hit the jump at the bottom the though crossed my mind that I was going far too fast. A shame I didn't act on it, because over the jump I went, and down I came. Unlike the previous Zipfy run, I tried to keep the sled under my butt. This transferred the shock of impact right through me, and peaked at my L1 vertebrae, inducing a burst fracture of the spinal column segment.

I didn't know those particular details at the time, but what I did know was that I was hurt. Very badly. There were a few boys from Jamie Brown's family who asked if I was ok after they celebrated my amazing jump. Then their inquiry turned to alert, then panic when I told them that I was not okay, and I needed help. They called, “MEDIC!” and waved their arms crossing them above their heads, the universal sign of help, and Caitlin came down as quick as she could. A little too quick, but she was able to stop herself from doing a faceplant in the snow. The best I could do was roll around, and Caitlin helped stretch out my back. I was quite comfortable lying on the snow, and as it turns out, icing a break is the best thing to do.

But I couldn't stay there forever, and after some rolling around, I managed to get to my feet. With the aid of Caitlin and Mike Meldrum, we were able to slowly walk up the hill. Some would say it was the longest walk ever, and while it was painful, I just focused on taking one step at a time, and before I knew it, we were at the top. Once at the top, I walked unaided back to the church building where I was looked over my Mark Sommerfelt. He checked to make sure all parts of my legs were still responsive, indicating there wasn't any nerve damage, but he strongly advised getting xrays to be sure what was wrong, and further advised it would be best to get an ambulance to take me there. In hindsight, that might have been a good idea, but when he made that ambulance suggestion, that's when the Tolley's showed up. I then opted to get a ride with Dad Tolley to the Grey Nuns Emergency in their GMC Sonoma. The most difficult thing was getting in and out of the vehicle.

Once at the hospital, Dad Tolley got me a wheelchair so that I didn't have to walk anymore, and that helped a little. After the preliminary check-in, he left me in the waiting room and told me to call him when they have a full diagnosis. It was at this point that I really had to use the bathroom, and was able to do so successfully. At the time I was just relieved to empty my bladder, but the fact I had full control of my bladder and bowels meant I had very little, if any, spinal nerve damage.

Once I was seen by a doctor, they but me on a bed with a slider board, in Front Hallway #2 area. With the exception of going for xrays and a CT scan, I was there for seven and a half hours. I'll tell you this much, if you think that hospitals are boring, try staring at the ceiling for seven hours! To be fair, I had my cell phone with me, and I was posting to Facebook and Twitter like there was no limit to my text plan. I also made a few calls, but it was encouraging to get words from people that were worried about me, and hoping all the best for my recovery.

I was a little frustrated, thinking that this was all a little overblown, and that I was going to be discharged once they came back with the results from the xray. When the doctor came back with a somber look on his face, then announced that I had fractured my L1, my entire attitude changed. I started crying and I was near inconsolable. The attending nurse asked if I needed a painkiller, to which I just told him that I was really freaked out. He told me to think positive.

There are few times in my life that I have felt quite that vulnerable. My other visits to the hospital, such as May 16, 2005, and November 3, 2004 are very close to match the intensity of worry and fear that choked my soul. Another time I had the same sense of dread was when I failed two courses in my second year. I was forced to face consequences for my actions and the reality of failure. With the engineering courses, they were quite difficult and required a significant amount of work, something that I didn't put in to the full force that I should have. Yes, I finished my degree and never had to take Dean's Vacation, but sometimes I wonder if that would have given me the needed boot in the rear that could have got me into a career that has a bit more of a future than an office assistant.

I need to get my resume and cover letter prepped for the tech position a family friend has waiting in the wings. It's not based in Edmonton, but it should pay sufficient, and it should also be a bit more fulfilling than what I do now.

Returning to the matter of my injury, after the CT scan confirmed the fracture, the official word was L1 burst fracture. The treatment would involve a back brace, which would be fitted at the Royal Alexandria Hospital, north of the downtown core. That meant I would have to be transported via ambulance. That was quite the experience, because they had to put a collar on me, strap me down to a spinal board, which was thicker and harder than the one I been lying on for the past eight hours. Though the trip was less than half an hour, my pelvic bone was just screaming in pain by the time we got there. Once I was on a bed, and the board was out, I was much relieved.

Then I needed to get some basic examinations. Like a rectal exam. As of 11:15pm 21 Feb 2011, I no longer have a virgin butt. Not to say it was a painful experience, just awkward. Especially since it was a male doctor that did the exam, and four female nurses were watching. That kind of sounds like a really kinky porn movie.

The events that followed get a little fuzzy. Largely due to the morphine that I was given to deal with the pain that I said was like a 12 on a scale from 1 to 10 with 10 being the highest. In retrospect, I probably didn't need the meds that bad. But that's in retrospect, and when you're in the thick of it, it's hard to judge what to do.