Saturday, December 20, 2008

How NOT to start a car in the dead of winter

I discovered that there is a proper way to operate a block heater. It involves a cord that is plugged into the block heater cord, and a functioning power circuit for the extension cord to connect to!

The first I discovered when we went out to the car around 1pm, with the intention of gettig some Christmas shopping done. How Foolish! The car was a frozen solid block of steel! Hence I tried the connection, which was not in place, and Caitlin and Rini and I all went to the park while Elene charged. When we returned, we found her UNPLUGGED. Now I understand that the car consumes a substantial amount of power when connected to the block heater, but know this, IF THE CAR IS TO FUNCTION IN TEMPERATURES OF MINUS HELL FROZEN OVER, IT NEEDS TO BE PLUGGED IN!

After this brief frustation, I used my super heated breath, at a temperature 60 degrees Celcius warmer than the air surrounding us, to melt the snow and ice that was in the plug, and connected it with all my might.

I return an hour later, just to see if this is working at all, and the engine refused to turn over. In fact it refused to do pretty much any thing aside from a dull 'Ruh ruh ruh ruh ruh,' which sounded awfully pathetic.

With the wisdom that it requires at least two hours for the engine to be sufficiently warm to function in the temperature, I returned to my humble basement abode to warm my tingling fingertips and everything else that was starting to freeze. More time passes, and we inform some of our friends that we will not be attending their Christmas party, and I go out into the frigid cold to attempt to bring Elene out of the frozen prison that has encased her. Alas, I am met with failure yet again.

At this point, I notice that there has been no change whatsoever in the sound of the engine each time I have tried the ignition. I would have though that three or four hours would be plenty of time to toastify the block and fluids inside. I inspect the cord, and everything seems fine. Nevertheless, I switch out the cord, with the hope that this new cord will function slightly better.

I then call the home of the other party we were hoping to attend tonight, and inform them that I was cancelling my RSVP. A bit of a bother, since I was hoping to get in touch with some people that I haven't seen in litterally years, but such is the arrangement, that it was not to be.

I have heard this said by others and myself, "Always listen to your wife." Caitlin asked me if I had checked the circuit breaker, or maybe she told me there was no way that we were going to make the party because we would have had to turn around and come home when we got there. One or the other. In any case, I checked the breaker next, and sure enough, there was a trip. With a flick of the switch, I headed back out to check on the car and the motion detector light that was on the same circuit. Wouldn't you know, I killed two birds with one stone. I don't know if Elene will start now, but I do know that the light is now operational.

What did we learn? My neighbour doesn't quite understand how a block heater works and it is possible to trip a breaker using a block heater.

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